The only real failure is failing to learn from failure

There is a story of a young reporter who was commissioned to interview an old and successful businessman. `Sir,' he asked politely, `what has been the secret of your success?'

The older man leaned back on his leather swivel chair, behind his shining mahogany desk, and replied,  `Two words, son, two words: right decisions.'

The reporter wrote it down. Then he asked another question. `And how do you learn how to make right decisions, sir?' he asked.

The successful business man leaned back further and replied, `One word, son, one word: experience.'

The reporter wrote this down, too, and then asked, `Well, sir, how do you acquire experience?'

The older man leaned forward over his desk and whispered conspiratorially, `Two words, son, two words: wrong decisions!'

The only real failure is failing to learn from failure.

One of the most puzzling verses in the Bible is Hebrews 5:8: `Although he was a Son, he learned obedience from what he suffered.'

Just what the writer means here raises many questions. How could the Son of God need to learn obedience? Why would he need to learn it in the first place? It is not appropriate to discuss these questions here. Maybe a simple answer is that he learned the nature of human obedience — not how to do it, but what it is like. One thing is clear. If any part of the Bible testifies to his humanity, this is it. And whatever the nature of the learning, if Jesus learned from suffering, how shall we escape it?

The greater tragedy is failing to learn from it. King Saul offers us a graphic example. On at least four occasions, he was confronted with his own weakness, folly or sin. But at the end of the day, he still hadn't learned from it.

On the first occasion, he disobeyed the commands of Samuel the prophet. When Samuel pointed out his fault, Saul replied, `I have sinned. I violated the Lord's command and your instructions. I was afraid of the people and so I gave in to them. Now I beg you, forgive my sin and come back with me, so that I may worship the Lord' (1 Samuel 15:24-25, 30).

Saul's words sounded fair, but nothing came of them. Later, through his inane jealousy, Saul caused David to flee for his life. Twice, David had the chance to kill Saul, but each time refrained from doing so. And each time, Saul acknowledged David's integrity and his own folly (1 Samuel 24:17ff; 26:21). But again, nothing changed. Things went on just as before. Saul was aware of his failure, but he didn't profit by it.

Over the years, I have known of several men who have had to leave the ministry because of sexual immorality. In a number of cases, they have had more than one opportunity to put things right. But they have failed to do so. If only they had learned from their mistakes. If only they had realised that they could turn things around and make a success of their lives, not a failure.

Most of the time, learning from failure means learning how to do the same thing better next time. Of course, in some circumstances, what we actually learn is that we should try something else! Often failing in some enterprise is simply a useful way of learning that our best talents lie elsewhere. Jane, for example, tried for years to learn to play the piano so that she could be useful at worship services. But on the rare occasions when she tried to do so, she played wrong notes, mistook the timing and, to be honest, put people off.

All the time this was happening, she found herself being sought out more and more to pray with needy people and to encourage the downhearted. Finally, she realised that her failings at the keyboard were simply a message telling her to forget trying to be a musician and to concentrate on what she could do well — namely, people-helping.

Not succeeding can be beneficial. It can help us to sort out our gifts and priorities and to make better use of our time and talents.

— from Barry Chant, Breaking the Power of the Past, Tabor Publications, 2000. Dr Chant is President of Tabor College. A new edition of Breaking the Power of the Past has just been released.